Confident Motherhood – Day 5

Treat each person/child as an individual

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Just as we said on Day 2, each of us is an individual, unique and special.

Sometimes it’s difficult to remember that about our children though.

Each one of them will have their individual character traits that make them uniquely them – and that’s the beauty of it. One day I was teaching my daughter how to do something and I was getting increasingly frustrated that she wasn’t doing it my way. She eventually blurted out “But I’m not you!” Well, that stopped me dead in my tracks and it suddenly dawned on me that she was right. From that day onwards I started looking at her through different eyes. I started to keep a look out for how she liked to do things and what methods worked for her.

When we treat our children as the wonderful individuals that they are, we allow them to flourish and become more comfortable in their unique skin. This helps them tremendously when it comes to trying to decide what they will and won’t do when they’re with their friends and dealing with peer pressure. If they have a strong foundation of being able to make up their own minds about what they will and won’t do and what they do and don’t like, they will be far more confident in their ability to stand their ground when a dodgy suggestion comes along.

This offers a perfect opportunity to you as a Mum, to go through moral foundations with them; explain the virtues of self control and optimism and help them to set the boundaries for their belief system.

When you look at each child as a unique individual it allows you to see them apart from the way their brothers and sisters behave. You get to see the uniqueness of your child which gives them permission to be them self. This means that you will see their character as something to celebrate and thus both of you will be less frustrated in the long run. It will also help you deal with the age old issue of ‘favourites’. When you can see the beauty in each child, then you’re able to love them all uniquely and not expect the same behaviour from them all.


· Look out for and celebrate each child’s uniqueness

· Find ways to nurture and foster their special talents, abilities and gifts

· Remind yourself that each of us is tremendously valuable.

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